My apologies, readers, for not posting on my usual Monday. Sadly, this past week was quite the set of challenges. On the sad side, we had to put down our family dog of 9 years. On the other side, a family member completed his military training and graduated.

What is one to say when life contains these bitter-sweet moments? One moment, at the gates of grief missing a beloved family canine, and shortly after, rejoicing for a family member who has achieved a unique honor (I’ve learned that 1% of the population currently could enlist, and of that group, only 1% make it to graduation). Not only that, but both are types of goodbyes, one for the remainder of this earth, and the other for an unspecified amount of time, never entirely sure when the next letter, phone call, or visit may be, or if that “next” will never come due to tragedy.

I must admit, right now, I’m exhausted! I’m sitting at a counter, writing this blog post, and I could just as easily lay my head down for the night. So, why do I bother to write? It’s a fair question, and the answer it quite simply because I know there are others who are experiencing some relatable degrees of joy and sorrow in their lives. And while I don’t have all the answers, I have a few in this particular area.

Most who have followed this blog for a while have read my story and know that I dealt with a major traumatic loss a decade and a half ago. I have spent many an hour grieving the loss, of my marriage and of the woman I had once known who had become a wildly different person, as well as grieving the loss of a life, house/home, church, and stability I had once enjoyed.

Today, I find myself in a similar place, at least emotionally. And while these moments have not been traumatic, as our dog’s declining health was a known issue and my family member’s commitment to service was known, it is still a grieving moment. I grieve for the time I can’t have with that family member, for the times that will never be with my beloved canine friend, for the challenges these events present to the predictability of my life and the perceived stability that provided.

A brilliant man once observed that anyone who thinks he/she is in control of any thing is deluded. While I challenge that statement on a micro-scale, in the macro-scale, it is profoundly true, and as one who likes predictability and stability, it often makes me uncomfortable. But in reality, hidden within that brilliant observation is a deep truth; there is One who is in control!

It is the Lord God Almighty, one God but three Persons, Father, Son (who was made into a man, both very God and very Man, we know as Jesus/Yeshua), and Holy Spirit. He is in control! Granted, we don’t always see it that way; sometimes, we feel like God must have fallen asleep at the wheel or maybe He’s not as good as we say He is, but none of that is true! In fact, it is rather like a child who thinks their parent is mean because the child can’t have candy late at night or a teenager who thinks their parent is being unreasonable because they won’t let them go to a party when they got a D in Geometry. As kids and teens, man of us have experienced these challenging moments. Similarly, many of us (I hope) have been able to look back on these moments, with our own children, from the perspective of our parents and realize that, in fact, our parents were doing a very loving thing (or, at least, trying to). But let’s not miss that this analogy is lacking a bit, as our parents were imperfect humans, but God is perfect and not merely a human (after all, Jesus did live and die as the God-man).

In point of fact, some of us can look back and see where our parents should’ve been more strict or more flexible, but God has no such shortcoming. He knows exactly what we, and this world, need to achieve His aims, which is the best things for those who love Him (Romans 8:28). Sometimes, events are specifically for us (such as something standing out in Scripture on a given day after we’ve prayed for a certain degree of wisdom). Other events are beyond us, meaning that they may contain a truth or lesson for us, but they may also contain similar-but-different things for another or even multiple others. In short, contrary to some, the world does not revolve around any one person, and contrary to others, we cannot force everyone to do what we’d like them to do.

So, where does that leave us? Interestingly, it leaves us in a great place, though emotionally difficult.

“Blessed are those who mourn, for they shall be comforted.” – Matthew 5:4

“Blessed be the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of mercies and God of all comfort, who comforts us in any affliction with the comfort with which we ourselves are comforted by God.” – 2 Corinthians 1:3-4

The above versus tell us that we are to allow ourselves to mourn losses, not as one who has no hope, but knowing that we will receive comfort from God, whether directly or through our fellow believers around us. Furthermore, we are reminded to comfort others, as we ourselves have been comforted, too. We are exhorted to find comfort in the Lord in any and all afflictions. Paul goes in 2 Corinthians to exhort the church there, expounding that there is no suffering that Christ cannot or has not comforted us through. We know that God Almighty has experienced rejection and loss revealed in Hosea, specifically, but in the whole of Scripture. And while He is in control, He still chooses to express emotional loss and grief, revealing that He is not some emotionally distant, self-insulating stoic, but He is relational and cares so deeply for us that He feels for us, like a parent when their child experiences their first break-up or their first friend-betrayal.

Further, we can see from Lazarus’ death (John 11), as well as making historical inferences about Joseph’s death, that Jesus experienced loss on earth. As the God-man (a term used to describe the mysterious union of the Divine and the human in Jesus, two natures unified in one), we know the Jesus lived a very real life, including losing loved ones, having friends who lost loved ones, and likely even losing a friend or two, prior to Lazarus’ death and resurrection. In short, God is fully capable of empathizing with and comforting us in whatever pains come our way.

So, as I grieve my dear canine’s passing, and as I grieve the end of this sweet time with my family member as a new chapter dawns, I can lean on the shoulders of Jesus, crying into His shirt, as it were, but also moving forward in His comfort and knowing that, in time, there will be an end to all such grief and loss, when He reigns as King of all. But for the immediate, I lean on Him, whether in tears or even when I need to pound on His chest in frustration, knowing that He cares and, in some way, cries along with me.

I don’t know what your particular grief is today; maybe you’ve lost a loved one, lost a furry friend, or maybe you’ve lost an innocence. In the midst of your grief, I can confidently say that Jesus is there, He has not left, and He will comfort you, if you’ll let Him; or maybe you already have, and I can confidently encourage you that He is comforting you, even now, whether it be in little reminders of the good times you’ve had, little nuggets of blessing that speak to your heart, and in many ways I can’t even know because they are that personal to you.

There’s a beautiful song written by Chris Rice called Untitled Hymn (Come to Jesus); my personal favorite is the rendition by Third Day, but nonetheless, the overarching message of the song is “Come/Run to Jesus” in whatever situation you find yourself. As I close out this posting, I encourage you similarly, run to Jesus! Press into His loving arms and chest and let His comfort envelop you and soothe your grief!

Godspeed – 1 Corinthians 15:10